i've been staring at my ceiling for an hour. it's been on my mind for a long time, i need to take it out before all these mixed feelings turn me all ugly inside.
i've been trying all my best not to let what you said destroy me, but the truth is that after all these times, your words are still at the back of my mind.
truth is that after seeing those texts, i never look at myself the same.
i lied because it didnt matter to you if you knew the truth.
did you think you were the only one going through a hard time? WE were in this TOGETHER you dumb ass..
so many times i wish i could tell you what you deserved to be told. but in the end i couldnt open my mouth seeing you struggling like that, so i buried them deep inside and let them hurt me instead. that's how much i care, and i hate myself for that.
all i did was just not to make things harder for you, no matter how bad it turned out for me.
maybe you dont remember.. i cared when no one else did.
